Since I broke up with my ex-husband Mike* three years in the past, he is had so many girlfriends I’ve nearly misplaced rely.
I’ve met 4 of them, however the others I’ve solely ever heard about from our daughters. My teenage women have grown very connected to a few of Mike’s girlfriends, and each time he breaks up with certainly one of them the ladies come to me, crying.
His first girlfriend after our divorce, Emily, obtained very near the ladies. Though our divorce was terrible, I took nice consolation within the information Mike had re-partnered with such a beautiful girl.
I would met her a handful of occasions and he or she was shiny and humorous, and he or she was additionally very affectionate with my women, which is one thing I used to be grateful for as their father is not very affectionate in any respect.
Emily’s household owned a seaside home and the ladies cherished going up the coast on weekends to go to their “step-grandparents”, who had been all the time very type to them. My mother and father dwell interstate and have little or no interplay with my women, so I used to be relieved to know that they had Emily’s mother and father of their life. Emily, who did not have youngsters, in all probability cherished the concept her mother and father had been getting some step-grandkids.
But it surely wasn’t to final. The women informed me they had been devastated when their dad introduced he’d ended issues with Emily. He additionally informed them she was “very upset”, however that she’d “recover from it.”
WATCH: Married at First Sight’s Mel Schilling on courting once more after a long-term relationship. (Put up continues.)
There was nothing I might do to make them really feel higher, aside from reassuring them Emily would be in contact with them. Sadly, she did not; I in all probability would not both if I had been in her footwear.
Lower than a month later, the ladies informed me, “Dad has a brand new girlfriend.” My 15-year-old stated she was involved the girl was, maybe, a bit younger for his or her father. I requested her how they knew this and he or she replied, “She seems 30 and Dad is sort of 50.”
It seems my daughter was right – Mike’s new girlfriend Sara was 32 and, similar to Emily, she did not have youngsters. My first thought was, “This may not final!” as I knew Mike was adamant he did not need extra youngsters (assuming the 32-year-old would possibly need youngsters sometime).
My women obtained as connected to Sara as they had been to Emily. She was a eager surfer and taught my women to surf, in addition to taking them horse driving. These had been two actions I definitely hadn’t completed with them, so I used to be grateful to her for exposing them to these experiences.
I met Sara a few occasions once I was dropping the ladies at their father’s home and he or she appeared pretty. I informed her my women adored her, and he or she stated, “You have raised your women so fantastically.” However that relationship did not final both; Mike apparently ended it when Sara began to get “too critical.”
Subsequent girl on the scene was a beautiful woman known as Tania, after which I met a health coach (I am unable to keep in mind her title!). Then, he began courting the mom of certainly one of my women’ mates from college. That felt a bit awkward, however a minimum of I knew she was a great particular person and the ladies favored her rather a lot. That ended after three months after which, a few week later, my women informed me their dad had a brand new girlfriend.
I am unable to sustain! One in every of my women stated, “What is the level of attending to know dad’s new girlfriend when there may be a brand new one subsequent month?”
If I had the nerve to carry this up with Mike, I would ask, “Are you able to please attempt to preserve a relationship, for the sake of our women, as a substitute of breaking apart and hooking up so shortly?”
Everyone knows relationships take work on either side. This is hoping my ex begins to develop up and realise being a “commitment-phobe” just isn’t such an incredible factor for our children.